The Year Isn't Over Yet
There's a moment every fall when I notice it: the light changes, the days shorten, and suddenly the end of the year feels close. For many of us, that brings a quiet tally. For some, it brings full on anxiety. “What did I do this year? What didn't I do? What am I still carrying?” Maybe this year has been wonderful. Maybe it hasn't looked anything like you expected.
If this year was hard, that tally can feel heavy. Maybe you lost someone, or a relationship ended, experienced job loss or you spent much of the year just getting through. Maybe you're tired in a way that sleep doesn't fix. Maybe you have been carrying something that you no one knows the full impact of. Perhaps you are still dealing with that.
Those issues can have us spinning. As I like to say to my clients, “going down the rabbit holes and tunnels.”
Here's what I want you to know: the way a year ends matters, and you still have a say in it.
The “say” I am referring to does not necessarily mean controlling the outcome or making the impossible, somehow possible. However, wouldn’t it be nice to end the year well?
Adjusting your expectations isn't the same as giving up on yourself
That doesn't mean cramming in goals before December. Sometimes ending the year well means finally resting. Perhaps it means finding peace by accepting there is a situation that you cannot change, if that is the truth of it. Sometimes it means letting yourself grieve what you've been holding off on feeling. And sometimes it means taking one honest step toward a change you've been putting off.
Instead of asking "What should I accomplish before the year ends?", try asking:
What do I want to be true about me by December 31st?
Not what you want to achieve, but who you want to be and how you want to feel walking into the new year.
Consider this:
Take a few quiet minutes this week with these three questions:
What am I ready to set down before the new year? (A resentment, a pattern, a story about myself.)
What do I need more of in these last months? (Rest, support, honesty, connection, play.)
What is one small step I can take this month that my future self will thank me for?
You don't need to answer them perfectly. Just notice what comes up, especially what surprises you.
The end of the year doesn't have to be a final judgment on the year. It can be a turning point.
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