Knowing Your Inherent Worth

When I worked at The Meadows, I remember teaching the concept of inherent worth and value to participants in the Survivors workshop—and witnessing the look of astonishment on their faces. It was as if I had spoken a foreign language. For many of them, it was the first time they had ever heard—or considered—that they were worthy simply because they exist.

So many of us, especially those who have experienced trauma, grow up internalizing the belief that our value is conditional. We learn to associate love and acceptance with performance: being good, being quiet, being helpful, being successful, being “not a problem.” We become masters at shape-shifting—working hard to prove our worth through achievement, people-pleasing, self-sacrifice, or perfectionism.

But here’s the truth that many trauma survivors never got to hear:

You don’t have to earn your worth. You already have it.

Your worth is not something you achieve.

It’s not something someone else gives you.

It’s not based on how much you’ve healed, how many boundaries you hold, how spiritual you are, or how productive you’ve been.

It just is.

Inherent worth means that you are valuable, lovable, and deserving of care and dignity simply because you are alive. Full stop.

For many survivors, this truth can be both beautiful and terrifying. Beautiful because it offers liberation from the inner critic and the hustle for approval. Terrifying because it challenges the identity built around proving oneself.

But when this truth is not only understood but felt in the body—when it moves from concept to lived reality—it changes everything. It allows for softness. For rest. For the ability to receive love without suspicion. And most of all, it lays the foundation for true self-compassion and healing.