How to date efficiently when your biological clock is ticking
It is not uncommon to feel that you are running out of time. Perhaps the years have passed in the blink of an eye while you were busy at your career, travel or a variety of things. Maybe a string of bad relationships has stolen your time, or you just haven’t met “the one”. There are a few things that you must consider using your time efficiently in the long run in the dating arena.
You must maintain a life while you are looking for love
Do not get consumed with dating to the point where you make it a job. Adapt an attitude of moderation with your dating activity. You must live your life naturally. Have time and enjoy friends, family and other activities. You will quickly experience dating burn-out if you don’t and this will impact your ultimate result.
Don’t settle
Be moderate with your dating activity but be selective. Remember, you are selecting someone who has the potential to be your child’s father. Whether you stay together or not, he will always be a part of your life. Select carefully and don’t rush!
Desperation will get you no where
Maintain a positive attitude. With other activities in your life. Visualize the relationship that you want and believe with all your heart it can happen, even if the present is showing you something different. Desperate energy attracts the wrong kind of guy.
Leave the fear behind
If you find yourself saying, “what if it doesn’t happen” or “it will never happen”, take a step back. Center yourself with self-care, meditation and support from friends. Believe that you can have what you want. What you seek is also seeking you.
Get clear on what you want
Finding the one can be like looking for a needle in a haystack unless you are clear about what you want. Identify the characteristics that you would like in a partner and relationship. If who you meet does not fit the bill because there are some deal breakers that you become aware of, it is time to move on. Do not waste your precious time with those who don’t fit the bill just because you are attracted to them.
Above all else, remember that you are the prize!
Lisa Angelini, MAPC, LPC